coffee habit

Sometimes I feel as though my need for a cup of coffee in the morning is a bad thing, a chemical dependency that's holding me back from true spiritual enlightenment, or something like that. I'll start entertaining the notion of giving up coffee and pursuing a more natural, wholesome way of living.

I imagine myself waking up each morning bursting with energy. I'll throw back the covers jump out of bed and say in a strong confident voice: "Good Morning World! Today's going to be a great day!" . Then I'd jog fifteen miles, paint the house, and spend twenty minutes meditating on some unanswerable Zen riddle in a rock garden I would've built in my backyard.

However the best part would be the smug sense of superiority I'd be able to have towards all those weak addicts that need their coffee every morning. I'd scoff at the way they can't function till they've had their morning Joe, laugh at their caffeine withdrawal headaches, and always make a point of somehow mentioning in conversations that "Oh, I don't drink coffee. Just don't need the stuff." After telling people about my non-coffee drinking superiority I'd demonstrate how much non-caffeine generated energy I have by doing back-flips while yodeling the Star Spangled Banner.

These thoughts usually come to me after I've just had my jumbo sized mug of java each morning. "I've got so much energy right now! Why would I need to drink coffee? Maybe I'll just stop drinking the stuff."

These intentions only ever last till the next morning.